Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge - II

Warning : If you have not seen DDLJ, you might miss the fun.

Raj : simran, hamein bhagna hi hoga. Ye log hamari shadi nahi hone denge simran.


Simran : Ye tum kya kah rahe ho raj. Tum to kahte the ki tum yahan kisi ka dil todne nahi, dil jeetne aaye ho. Hamari shadi tabhi hogi jab babuji mera hath khud tumhare hathon mein denge. Tumhara irada kyun badal gaya raj?


Raj : simran, main janta hun tum kya soch rahi ho. Tumhe lagta hai ki main bahut hi awara kism ka ghatiya ladka hun. Par aisa nahi hai simran, main janta hun ki ek hindustani ladki ki izzat kya hoti hai. Maine kabhi sapne mein bhi tumhe bhagane ke baare mein nahi socha tha.


Simran : phir ab aisa kya ho gaya raj ? Yaad hai tumhari maa kya kaha karti thi tumse. "Beta, zindagi ke har mod pe tumhe do raste milenge ek galat aur ek sahi. Galat rasta asaan hoga, tumhe apni taraf kheenchega. Aur jo sahi rasta hoga, ho sakta hai usmein tumhe kadi mushkilon ka samna karna pade, bahut taklif mile; par yaad rakhna akhir mein jeet tumhari hi hogi."


Raj : wo sab to theek hai simran lekin .......


Simran : lekin kya raj ? Ab to tum mere babuji ko bhi jan gaye ho. Thode kadak mijaj hain, par agar tum roj hamare ghar kaam karne aaoge, maa ka rasoi mein hath bataoge, chutki pe apna fraud gentleman image jhadoge, buaji ke liye saree kharidkar unhe maska lagaoge. Subah 5 baje uthkar, dhoti pahankar, kabootaron ko dana daloge; to babuji tumse jaroor impress ho jayenge raj. Tum mere liye itna bhi nahi kar sakte !


Raj : simran, tum galat samajh rahi ho. Ghar ke kaam karne mein mujhe koi aitraj nahi hai (Main aur koi kaam kar bhi nahi sakta) Aur ladkiyon (Auraton) ko dana dalne mein bhi mujhe koi problem nahi hogi (Akhir tumko bhi to aise hi pataya tha), Rahi baat babuji ki.. simarn wo sab to main kar hi raha hun, roj subah subah dhoti pahankar kheton mein jata hun, kabootaron ko dana dalne. Ab to wahan ke kabootar bhi "tujhe dekha to ye jana sanam..." gane lage hain. Aur babuji ...... mujhe apne pyaar pe poora bharosa hai ki aaj nahi to kal wo maan jayenge.


Simran : Phir tum kis baat se ghabra rahe ho raj ? You are "The Raj Malhotra" (Who failed in a london university) yaad hai tumhe; jab tumne mujhse poocha tha.. pyar karti ho mujhse? bharosa hai mujh par ? to maine tumse kya kaha tha


Raj : Yaad hai simran, sab yaad hai. Par jitna bharosa tumhe is Raj par hai, utna hi bharosa mujhe us Raj par.


Simran : Kya matlab ???


Raj : simran, yeh sab jo tumhe yaad hai, wo ddlj-I tha. Ab ddlj-II chal rahi hai. Aur ismein tum aur tumhare babuji punjabi nahin, marathi hain, aur main ek north indian. MNS ne press conference mein yeh elaan kiya hai ki keval 'sons of the soil' hi marathi ladkiyon se shadi kar sakte hain. Outsiders ne hamari naukriyan to cheen hi li hain, chokriyan ham nahin cheenne denge. ab tum hi batao simran main kya karun.. mujh jaise ek north indian ka vanmanoos se shadi karna asaan hai, par ek marathi manoos se nahi.


Simran : ye kya kah rahe ho raj. Raj hi mere raj ka dushman ban gaya ?


Raj : han simran, hamare pass koi aur rasta nahi hai, hamein bhagna hi hoga. hamein bhagna hi hoga simran.


Before they could run away after seeking the blessings of his pops and her babuji, MNS got the news. They came with lathis and guns, kuldeep also joined them and started beating everybody. Raj (malhotra), his pop, her babuji, ajeete and everybody. No gurror ko lalkarna buisness worked to awake the hidden fighter in Raj and all of them got thrashed brutally by the MNS.

In between all this mayhem, raj found a chance to utter his final dialogues

Raj : simran, maine pahle hi kaha tha tumse, ki chalo bhag chalte hain. Tum hi nahi mani. Par jo bhi hua, shayad sahi hua simran. Ye (MNS wale) hamare neta hain, ham inhe vote dekar parliament bhejte hain. Hamein koi haq nahin banta ki ham apni khushi ke liye inke samman ko thes pahunchayein. Akhir ye hamare neta hain, hamara bhala bura hamse behtar samajh sakte hain. Tumahri shadi mujh jaise kisi awara ladke se nahi ho sakti. To kya hua agar ye awara tumhein diwanon ki tarah pyar karta hai, to kya hua agar use tumhare alawa aur koi chehra dikhai nahi deta. To kya hua simran, to kya hua ..... pyar sab kuch to nahi hota na.


And he hops into the local train without simran (since there was MNS, it was mumbai. And since it was mumbai, there was local train). Simran is crying and pleading to the MNS workers. In fact everybody is pleading.. that fellow kuldeep also starts feeling sympathetic towards her. But MNS is made of tough people. Their resolve could not be broken by some stupid romance.. to kya hua agar (oh forget it.. these corny dialogues suit only a hippy looking, stammering srk)

Now, there are two options for the climax :

The first is that MNS will not let simran run towards the train. So, in that case this movie may need to be titled differently. "Soil-wale dulhaniya le jayenge"

The second option is that MNS heart (I presume they also have heart, head, brain; please avoid the debate) melts and the leave simran's hand saying... " ja simran ja, jee le apni jindagi; is ladke se jyada pyar tujhe aur koi nahi kar sakta" . simran will run, raj will hang at the train gate (he was hanging from the gate anyway.. mumbai local remember). But simran will still be not able to make it (It is tough enough to catch a standing local, forget a running one. What were you thinking simran). And mumbai will "move-on" from this tragedy. After-all 'bade bade (pra)deshon mein aisi choti choti baatein hoti rahti hain"

So irrespective of the two possible climaxes, the movie will still be titled " Soil-wale dulhaniya le jayenge"

Disclaimer : The author was watching DDLJ, when he started reading a news regarding marathi pride. So he had a deadly cocktail for his mind, and the result was a nasty hangover. So, if anybody is offended, please forgive the author for his drunken like state. And yeah... when i said MNS, i meant Marathi Nari Sena, not that MNS. You controversy loving sickos :P